Idiosyncratic rapper RiFF Raff dropped album Neon Icon on Tuesday, June 24, 2014. The album can be described as being ‘one of a kind.’ That said, Neon Icon is also much better than expected, giving listeners a ‘treat’ you might say. The biggest treats from Neon Icon besides RiFF Raff’s personality itself are the lyrics, many of which are outlandish as albeit. Featured below are some of the most enjoyable and ridiculous lyrics from Neon Icon.
“You wanna know something about my right arm? / I done flex so hard, I set off fire alarms…” – “Introducing the Icon”
Basically, RiFF Raff considers himself to be “the man,” much like the Aloe Blacc song.
“Aw sh*t look who it is, it’s the Gucci Man with the spray tan…” – “Introducing the Icon”
These lyrics represent one of several instances where RiFF Raff seems to compare himself to someone black – in this case, rapper Gucci Mane.
“…A lot of sh*t up on my chest, Dolly Parton” – “Kokayne”
RiFF Raff has a lot to say. He likens this to Dolly Parton’s… you see where I’m going with this.
“Ice on my hands, should have won a damn Grammy” – “Wetter Than Tsunami”
“Ice” is normally associated as being bling, but even from RiFF Raff the assertion that his bling would qualify him to win a Grammy seems incredibly ludicrous. The MC seems to be referring his own gifts as a rapper (he’s the “ice”), stating those gifts should have already been recognized at the Grammys, the premier recognition of artistry.
“Met this b*tch at the mall, ass like two volleyballs / supersize the chain, like it was McDonald’s” – “Wetter Than Tsunami” (Verse 1)
This one is easy. RiFF Raff lusts after a hot girl he met the mall, particular admiring her booty. Additionally, RiFF Raff loves his bling-bling, specifically getting the biggest chain he can. He likens his gaudy chain to the largest, most popular food chain, McDonalds.
“Hyper color chain with the Similac flow / rocking all this snow, might freeze a rainbow” – “Wetter Than Tsunami” (Verse 2)
RiFF Raff is iced out. “Iced” takes on a second meaning in this particular song, referencing how sick he is as an MC.
“Paperboy, talk noise / now I’m in Chinatown, Bok Choy” – “Versace Python” (Verse 1)
Bok Choy is Chinese cabbage – at least that’s the traditional definition. “Paperboy” likely refers not to the newspaper delivery boy, but rather someone loaded with money. Even though RiFF Raff is “getting paper,” perhaps he shops in Chinatown, getting what he wants for less… or maybe not.
“When I wake up, it’s a mystery / every time I open my mouth, history” – “Versace Python” (Verse 2)
RiFF Raff is a party animal. Whatever he ends up spitting, however is classic.
“Yeah mysterious, my mermaids are bi-curious / she done got intoxicated, girlfriend is furious…” – “Lava Glacier” (Verse 1)
Seems like RiFF Raff’s fantasies are realized. Enough said.
“Like an addict threw up, I done poured a four in a codeine / Sonic the Hedgehog cup versus Knuckles in my mailbox cup…” – “Lava Glacier” (Verse 1)
Drugs, drugs, and more drugs. “Four” and “codeine” are a dead giveaway RiFF Raff is referencing the infamous sizzurp.
“Tip-toeing in my Jordans / I done came down / Tip-toeing in my Jordans / Just copped a Porsche / Tip-toeing in my foreign / You motherf*ckers borin’ / you sleeping on me, snorin’ / don’t worry, cause I’m…” – “Tip Toe Wing in My Jawwdinz” (Hook)
RiFF Raff is awesome, and yet any number of people aren’t paying him the attention he deserves. He also takes the time to brag about material things, like any other rapper of course.
“At the titty bar, I ain’t afraid to tip ‘em / me and Sergio throwing pesos at some strippers…” – “Tip Toe Wing in My Jawwdinz” (Verse 1)
“Make it Rain” seems appropriate here… just saying.
“My skills bending hands, no more shaking hands / you got to bring some bad b*tches if you want a second chance” – “Maybe You Love Me” (Verse 1)
Apparently the way to appeal to RiFF Raff is to provide him with women to have sex with. Otherwise, you’re off his radar.
“I pull a car apart / You should practice martial arts, the way you karate chop my heart / I could leave your ass or you could play your part / You could reset or we could restart” – “Maybe You Love Me” (Verse 2)
Perhaps there is an emotional component, but the lyrics scream sex.
“Hassle me I’m Tim McGraw, I don’t pass the ball / ball hard, fourth quarter, shoot the lights off / fast break, three-on-one, I’ll tear the basket off / Aw sh*t, look who it is the white Wesley Snipes” – “Aquaberry Dolphin” (Verse 1)
Basically, RiFF Raff ‘goes off’ when the game is on the line. No defense can stop his scoring abilities – he’s the MVP. Whether or not RiFF Raff actually can ball is besides the point – he’s rap’s MVP and can out-rap anybody.
“Mark my words, I don’t need acceptance / I’m catching interceptions on you innocent pedestrians…” – “How to Be the Man” (Verse 1)
RiFF Raff likens his game as an MC to being a football player making big time plays capturing interceptions. That’s “how to be the man” after all.
“Might hit the club and it’s the white Danny Glover / Rap game Uncle Ben pulling rice out the oven…” – “How to Be the Man” (Verse 2)
RiFF Raff’s likening of himself to Danny Glover is silly, but it seems like the rapper has great respect and admiration for the veteran actor. While the MC referencing Uncle Ben’s rice would have been awesome without any strings attached, anytime cooking is mentioned in hip-hop, it’s usually shady.
“They wanna tell you what you can’t do based on formal facts / If I wanted to hear that bullsh*t I’d be in history class” – “Cool it Down” (Verse 2)
Education isn’t important to RiFF Raff, particularly given the emphasis placed on it. He writes off education in these lyrics as facts that are meaningless to him and his life.